I love going down on women. Feel free to smirk, make jokes at my expense, but I take the utmost pleasure in knowing that while I’m down there, I’m making sure she’s having the best time of her life. Some guys seem to think it’s gross or that it ‘smells like fish’. Clearly they think their balls smell like a rose garden. Here’s a tip: they don’t.
It shouldn’t bother me as much as it does, except the guys who seem to kick up the most fuss about it are the ones who expected the girl should be completely onboard with sucking them off. I’m not even going to go into how gross that is. Girls, if you’re dating a dude like that… get the fuck out of that relationship. You can do better.
Sometimes there’s some more unexpected moments though. I mean, not every vagina is the same. They all look a bit different. And again, that’s nothing to kick a fuss up about. But there are situations like last month.
I don’t really have time for a fulltime commitment, so I tend to look for more casual things. I like going on dates, don’t get me wrong, I just don’t see myself settling down anytime soon. Last week, I was on my second date with a girl named Ava.
Ava was great. She was in her first year of nursing school, had this adorable snort whenever she laughed, and she had a mane of fiery red hair that nearly reached the bottom of her back. I was, well, a little excited to see if the carpet really did match the drapes.
The date was great, we watched a movie, had a nice walk to her place where she started making coy comments about me staying the night. I went with it, we both knew what we were interested in happening.
The door barely closed behind us before we jumped each other.
We made our way to the bedroom, I lost my shirt and my belt somewhere along the ways, Ava was working on undoing the button on her skinny jeans. I ended up kicking my shoes off so hard they hit the wall with a bang, we both jumped out of our skin before laughing and going back to what we were doing.
It was going pretty well, I had my hand down the front of her panties, she was moaning and grinding into me… when I felt something wet. Not that kind of wet, get your head out of the gutter, no. A lot more wet than that. I pulled my fingers free and held them in front of her eyes. Ava’s face was struck with horror. “Shit! Are you serious?!”
She’d started her period. She probably had midmovie and just didn’t notice, the front of her sky blue striped panties were already stained red. Those were definitely ruined now. Too bad, I knew how girls were with their cute underwear.
Ava’s face went more crimson than her hair as she drew her knees to her chest, frantically apologizing and unable to look me in the face, I’d almost started fingering her bloody vagina and that was probably really gross, I could just go if I wanted, and that she was really, really sorry, her period was supposed to start next week and it was just early…
I quietly shushed her as I examined my fingers more thoroughly. The blood was bright, almost like cherries. Without another thought I popped my fingers into my mouth and lightly sucked on them. It was a little bitter, but nothing harmful… in fact it was actually not that bad.
I didn’t think Ava could blush any deeper and I was proven wrong, her hand flung itself in front of her mouth as she tried to stammer a response. She was caught somewhere between disgust and maybe a little arousal. I pulled my fingers out, all clean, waving them in front of her eyes.
“If you want me to stop, I’ll leave, but I’m hardly grossed out. And I’ve heard the best cure for period cramps is an orgasm.”
Ava stuttered a bit more before I gently tugged down her panties. A nervous smile spread across her face as she spread her legs, her inner thighs already a little slick with that bright red.
Needless to say, we both got away from this situation happy. I even ended up staying the night and going down on her again in the morning, even though Ava warned me that her flow was, well, stronger. I didn’t mind. It actually saved me a lot of trouble.
You see, I have very unique dietary requirements. I doubt I need to spell out what that means, but if you’re a bit of a slow sort, don’t worry, I’ll catch you up.
One of the body’s main arteries is in the thigh, did you know that? The femoral artery. Usually you people write us going for the wrist, or if you wanna get kinky, the neck. But the inner thigh… that’s actually working out for the better. When someone’s going down on you, you expect a little nibble of the thigh, a soft bite, to get things heated up.
They never see it coming. Sometimes I don’t end up killing them, but I really do need to drink a bit to keep myself satisfied for a few weeks. So yeah. I have a few bodies behind me. But luckily for me, there’s an alternative. Women naturally expel blood once a month, after all. It’s not nearly as good as the fresh stuff, there’s some extra ‘bits’ in there I’m sure that makes a lot of my kind squeamish, but hey. That’s part of what makes it fun.
Ava and I have another date for later this week. I timed it out, she should be ‘on the rag’, so to speak. I rather like her. I might have to keep her around for a few years.