A great one night stand leaves two things for me: great memories and no strings attached. Bonus points is if there’s no evidence left behind. But sometimes one cannot get lucky enough for that bonus.
“Oooooh, someone got a little action this weekend,” Aisha teased as she slid over to my cubicle on her chair, grinning like a Cheshire Cat.
I laughed sheepishly and rubbed my neck, where the still prominently red hickey stood out from my skin, like a proud signal of ‘I got laid’. “Yeah. He got a lil mouthy,” I said.
Aisha laughed and slapped her knee. “Least someone around here is. Who was it? Was it Ben? Oh my god, Chris, it better have been Ben!”
“No, no,” I waved that off, Ben was straighter than a ruler and I was too impatient to try to change that, “some guy I met at the bar. Sexy as hell, name was uh…” I had to rack my brain for a few seconds, “Claud? Or something weird like that.”
Aisha wrinkled her nose. “Not something I’d imagine screaming, but eh, could be worse. What was he like? Appearance wise, appearance wise, I’m not interested in every dirty detail!” She raised her hands as if she expected to be physically bombarded with tales about exactly how big his throbbing dick was.
I had to bite down on my lip to stop from laughing too hard. “Uh, tall. Dark hair. Accent, I think it was Russian… Broad shoulders. Washboard abs. Really standoffish at first but I got him to warm up after a few shots. But yeah, super mouthy. You can’t even see the ones under my shirt, I look like I’m polka dotted.” I rubbed my neck again. “How bad is it?”
“Honestly, it can pass for a bug bite.” Aisha slid back to her desk. “I think I just saw Bianca, act like you’ve been working all morning.”
A good friend knew when to stop gossiping. The time to stop gossiping was when the bitchy boss came into the area and started stalking about like a wildcat.
About noonish, my mouth was dryer than the Sahara Desert. I reached for my water bottle only to find that I’d already emptied it. Super thirsty thanks to the dry ass air conditioning. I groaned and got up to refill it.
“Don’t be slacking, Chris,” Bianca quipped as she walked on by. I pressed my lips together, ignoring the urge to remind her that I could absolutely get up to get something to drink before walking to the bathroom.
Once I was in there, I decided to take a piss too- I’d seriously been downing water all morning.
I just finished pissing when the door opened. I caught sight of Ben walking into the washroom, looking like he’d just been told he had three weeks to live. I zipped up and went to wash my hands. “You look like hell,” I deadpanned.
“My wife just sent me divorce papers.”
Oooh. In my shock I accidentally turned on the hot water too high, burning my hands. I hissed and quickly added cold water. “Ouch. Um… sorry?” I was horrible for these kind of situations. Especially since Ben was ultra fucking sexy. Hard to concentrate on things.
“It’s… I just…” Ben ran his hand through his hair. “I don’t know what the fuck I did wrong, you know man?”
As someone with commitment issues, I could more along the lines of what Ben’s wife was thinking, but I knew that’d be a dick move to bring up. “She’s a bitch if she’s not even gonna try to make it work,” I said as I dried my hands. “You’re a great guy, she’s clearly fucking this up.”
Ben sighed and leaned back, but I caught a hint of a smile on his lips. “Thanks, man. I gotta get back to work… hey, is that a hickey or a spider bite?” His eyes landed on my neck and I cleared my throat and adjusted my collar.
“Nice, er… maybe not nice. It looks really uncomfortable,” Ben walked up to the other sink and splashed water on his face, “I gotta get back to work. Keep the divorce thing on the downlow, kay?” With that, he walked out.
Frowning, I examined the hickey in the mirror. It did kinda look worse than it felt, it actually looked a little… swollen. Weird.
The next morning I stumbled into the bathroom, wondering if there was anything nice I could say to Ben. I like the single and ready to mingle life, I don’t know how people tie themselves down to someone for a more permanent situation.
I stepped into the shower and looked down at my chest.
And then I screamed.
I leaped out of the shower, nearly slamming my dick into the counter. I looked at the mirror, wondering if it was just a trick of the light, but my stomach dropped so hard I felt myself nearly puke.
My chest was covered in what looked like swollen bug bites, bright red and irritated. I poked one and my stomach churned. What the actual shit. I sunk to the floor and touched the one just below my belly button, it looked like Rudolph’s fucking nose. It gave under my harder prods, like an oversized pimple.
I remembered Claud sucking extra hard right about there.
Shit. I had an STI. I was going to die.
The hardest one to hide was, of course, on my neck. Turtlenecks were not my style, but I did not want to show off my ‘hickey’. Aisha rolled over to my desk, her lips pursed in a concerned manner. “Whoa, Chris. What’s with the turtle neck? Getting tired of the hickey jokes?” She asked.
I swallowed. This was humiliating. “Um… yeah, sure. It just gets a lil old. Plus I might be visiting my mom tonight and she still thinks I’m a straight virgin. Can’t have her realizing I got my ass rammed by a hot guy Saturday,” I said, trying to keep my voice level.
Aisha was a good friend, so she knew something was up, but she was also a good friend who knew to back off. She chewed her bottom lip before she nodded. “Okay, okay. I can’t blame you. I’ll lay off too,” She said before rolling back to her desk. Right on time too, Bianca the Vulture was doing her rounds.
I kept my eyes glued to my computer until I got so thirsty my lips started to crack. I could feel blood welling up on the inside of my mouth. I got up and walked to the bathroom to refill my water bottle.
It was halfway full when I felt my neck twitch.
Gasping, I pulled down my collar to reveal the painfully large lump. It twitched again, noticeably, before it began to pulse.
The fucking STD pimple from hell was pulsing in time with my heartbeat.
I couldn’t breathe. I carefully prodded it with my finger and it squirmed. I jerked my hand away and nearly lost my balance. I couldn’t fucking breathe. What the actual shit was wrong with me?!
“There you are!”
Hearing a woman’s voice in the men’s bathroom is really not something you want to hear at the best of times, least when you’re me. And at this moment, I really wanted to tell Bianca exactly what I thought of her stupid bottle blond perm as she strutted in like she owned the place.
She set her hands on her hips as I slowly turned around, keeping the monstrosity of a bump on my neck covered with my hand. “You’ve been in here ten minutes and you’re just primping in the mirror. Don’t think this won’t turn up in your next review!” She shook a finger at me before she wrinkled her nose. “What the hell are you doing? Put your hand down, it’s creeping me out!”
“I’m taking care of something,” I managed to say in a strangled tone, “I think I need to go home, I’m… I’m not well.”
“Bullshit!” Bianca strode up and ripped my hand down, her eyes turning baseball size when she saw the thing on my neck. “Jesus Christ, what the fuck-”
The lump exploded, yellow-green pus covering her face and wide open mouth. For once, Bianca had nothing to say, only to look frantically at the glob that had landed on her fingernail before my neck exploded in excruciating pain.
I collapsed back against the counter, banging my head as it felt like something was pulling on my neck. No, not on my neck. Inside. From the inside of my fucking neck. I couldn’t see it. I just felt it pulling itself from the newfound wound and in a dark blur launched itself into Bianca’s mouth.
Bianca gagged loudly before her eyes rolled back, the veins in the whites popping and flooding her eyes with blood before she collapsed on the ground, writhing like she was being electrocuted. My head felt light, I could only watch as her body twitched a few more times before going deathly still. No breathing. No movement. I blacked out after that.
I woke up on an unknown couch. The place was nice. Super nice. I sat up and nearly cried, black dots swarming in front of my eyes that forced me to lay back down.
“Chris? You okay?”
Ben walked into the room and I swore I was in heaven. When Ben dressed down, he dressed down. Sweatpants, t-shirt. Had a bleach stain on said t-shirt. Not gonna lie- it was fucking hot.
Memories of Bianca’s bloody eyes killed any thoughts of getting turned on.
Ben sat at the end of the couch, those perfect fucking eyes looking at me. He looked so damn worried.
“We found you and Bianca… well, Bianca’s body in the bathroom. Doc says it looks like she had an aneurysm burst. Ticking time bomb. I mean, I hated her, but Jesus, what a way to go. I offered to take you back to my place to keep an eye on you, you might have a concussion and we’ll go the hospital if you feel like you need it.” He reached forward and rested a hand on my knee. “What happened?”
I opened my mouth and made the least sexy gurgling sound imaginable. Fucking kill me.
“I’ll get you something to drink.”
Water! God, water sounded amazing right now. When he returned with a bottle, I drained the thing so fast it was probably embarrassing, water dripping down my chin. I cleared my throat, god. Still so fucking thirsty. “Thanks,” I croaked.
“Good thing I grabbed two,” Ben laughed as he handed me the one he’d taken a sip or two from. I sucked that one down at a more respectable rate, finally feeling a little quenched. I still didn’t sit up though. I learned my lesson.
“I… I think I’m sick.”
Ben’s eyebrows drew together and he leaned forward. “Yeah? What’s wrong?” He said.
God, he was gonna get freaked out. I whimpered as I pulled up my shirt, shuddering once I saw the ‘hickeys’. They’d gotten worse, some starting to turn purple at their tip and becoming cone shaped. Ben gasped and shot back, his face twisted with revulsion. “Fucking Christ! What happened to you?” He breathed out.
I sobbed as I began to pull my shirt back down. “I don’t fucking know, man. I was just… these all happened after…” I felt my nose start to get all drippy. Boy. That was sexy.
Ben stopped me and slowly touched one of the hickeys. It pulsed and swelled. He breathed in sharply, still obviously thinking ‘what the actual fuck?’ but also a little fascinated. “The time you got the hickey?” He guessed.
“Dude, I swear to god, I used protection,” I said, staring at the ceiling. “I’m not an idiot, I’m a fucking gay guy whose uncle died from fucking AIDs… the guy was all over me though. And I swear to god each one of his lil marks he left turned into… these…” I sobbed and covered my face. Ben was going to freak the fuck out. I was fucked.
Again, Ben touched one of the swollen lumps. “I’m not assuming anything, I promise, shit happens… but… what are they?” He asked.
“… This one,” I pointed at my neck, which had been bandaged up when I was out, “Something… something came out of it. And it attacked Bianca. And… and it killed her.”
Ben jerked back much quicker. “Fuck!” He eyed the hickeys again, clearly much more careful. “But… how… that’s not… they’re going to open soon?” He guessed.
I glanced down and saw that the one he’d touched had begun to twitch. I whimpered as I covered it. “Just go, get out of here. I’m fucking dead, man.”
Ben got up, looking ready to run out the front door… before he sat down and started to rub the lump. I gasped and swatted his hand away. “Jesus, what are you doing?!” I shrieked.
“… I mean. I might as well be dead too.”
Ben glanced around the room, his eyes started to seem whimsical. “We’d been married so long. Ten years this November. Highschool sweethearts. Prom King and Queen,” definitely not shocked he was Prom King, “and I was finally bringing up having kids… and she’s gone.” His chest shuddered.
He was crazy. He was fucking crazy. “Come on, Ben, don’t be stupid. Please. You have so much going for you!” Especially with Bianca having kicked it, he’d be in line for a promotion. Morbid way to think about it, but fair, I figured.
“No I don’t.” Ben sniffed and wiped his eyes quickly. “I… I really don’t. And hey, at least this way you won’t be alone?”
I didn’t realize that once he’d left I’d be alone. With these fucking twitching lumps that used to be hickeys. And god, I hated being alone. I’d rather have my innards ripped out than be alone. And I’d especially not want to die alone.
I took his hand and sobbed. “God, you’re a fucking moron, Ben,” I said as the lump slowly began to swell.
He nodded before he brought his fingers up and like popping a pimple, squished the largest lump.
The smell of pus and rotten flesh filled the air and I started to gag. What the hell was wrong with me?! How had I not felt pain?! How was I still not in pain!?
The pain kicked in when the thing began to crawl from my ribs.
It was like a worm, a brown worm with yellow stripes lining its side. It probably wasn’t longer than a shoelace and didn’t seem to have eyes. It squirmed out from inside me, my skin making a squelching sound. Its parasitical jaws opened, three teeth from its small mouth extending out. Ben was frozen, staring at that thing.
Then he reached up and petted it.
I could’ve laughed if it didn’t hurt. Ben was petting a goddamn murderous snake-worm parasite that had eaten god knows how much of me. It was fucking crazy.
Instead of trying to rip his throat out though, the parasite seemed to croon, leaning into his touch. It rubbed against his fingers before its teeth set into his finger. Ben screeched as blood started pouring from the stub that was once his pointer finger. The parasite squealed as it crawled from my chest and dove for his stomach.
Ben’s mouth opened in a silent scream as it burrowed in, I caught a glimpse of its fin like tail before it was gone. Ben’s eyes went glassy before he collapsed on top of me… and with his weight he successfully burst all of the remaining hickeys on my chest.
I screamed as the parasites erupted from my skin and punctured through Ben’s, Ben’s eyes going blank as they chewed right through his shirt and into his skin. One bit through his neck and blood spurted onto my face. I cried and clung onto the couch and squeezed my eyes shut, waiting for things to become dark and for me to finally just fucking die.
But that didn’t happen.
I didn’t lose consciousness. I didn’t start to go numb. Everything remained as sharp and painful as when it first started. And even though I thought I was stuck to a dead guy, Ben was just as alive as I was.
It must’ve been hours after it first started when Ben finally seemed to come back to life. He gasped and tried to pull back, only for the worms connecting our bodies to screech and their bodies to go taut. Ben cried out and fell back on top of me.
“… I think they’re eating me,” He gasped out.
I nodded and rested my head on his shoulder. “I’m… I’m fuckin sorry, man,” I whimpered.
Ben’s bloody hand reached up to my face and stroked it. “… Not your fault,” He groaned before passing out again.
Outside grew dark. I felt tired. Ben kept drifting in and out. I knew we had to die soon.
Then two of the worms flopped from our bodies and scooted to the door. No! I whimpered and reached for them as they squalled and made their way out of the house from underneath a crack in the door.
“What happened?” Ben slurred.
I cried. Not more people. Not more people.
The two returned back hours later, this time through the window. They had to break it, the shattering of the glass making me jump and the parasites complained about how they were jostled about. The two who returned were much fatter now, and as they squirmed in through holes in my ribs I felt something tear into my stomach.
And then I felt… better.
Ben clearly felt the same effect. He blinked and looked around, even a little color returning to his cheeks. “The fuck?” He muttered.
I reached up and gripped his bicep, pulling back as much as our torsos would allow. Our skin was flayed out, the holes passages between our bodies as the parasites dived in and out. Their squeals grew musical, like they were singing a song.
“They’ll… they’ll take care of us, Ben. We’re their home now. They’ll take care of us.”