The Odd Cat Lady – Page 2 – Don't fear the monsters

A Bachelor to Die For- Week One

I swear, I thought I was just starring on a dating show.

My name is Paige. I decided to put my name in the hat for Mr. Right as a joke, I just broke up with a long term boyfriend and hey, dating shows are all fake anyway right? Even if I got in, which was a slim chance anyway, I’d be told what to say and what to do. All for a good show.

I was shook when I got the call saying I’d been picked, pack my bags, I was going to be famous. Despite not really caring at first, I got really, really excited. I tend to binge watch reality shows when I’m having a bad day, just to have something to laugh at, so appearing on one sounded like a great time.

The Worst Wedding I’ve Ever Photographed

I’ve been a wedding photographer for nearly ten years and I thought I’d seen it all. Trashy, beautiful, tragic, hilarious, or just bizarre. I have stories. I have the typical groom getting caught getting it on with the maid of honor, family getting into brawls, brides OD-ing in the bathroom, gay couples having no one attend their wedding (or worse, the one uninivited homophobic relative crashing to just be a dick) stories. But we aren’t here for the typical stories. If we were, we’d be here all day. We’re here for the wedding from last October.

Fall weddings are probably my favorite, if I ever get married I’ll probably get hitched in the fall. It was the parents of the bride who came to me, asking for my services for a wedding in two weeks. Their original photographer apparently up and quit on them and they were desperate to have their darling daughter’s wedding immortalized in picture format.

Little Dead Nancy, Part Two

Part One

TW: Mentions of sexual assault.

‘Little Dead Nancy,

Sitting on the bench,

One eye long,

and one eye gone,

Little Dead Nancy,

My friend lies dead,

Come along,

join me,

let’s go see Garth together!’

Doesn’t nearly flow off the tongue nearly so well as the first verse, but it gets the point across.

We waited in the woods for a long time, she and I. It was cold out at night, but it wasn’t colder than we were. It was strange not seeing my breath on every exhale. But I wasn’t bored. We had a lot of time to talk.

Family Reunion

Eliza’s poisonous glare focused on the older brother, remaining ominously quiet for several seconds. Then she nodded. “Thank you for realizing how your behavior was unacceptable. Come here,” She said, motioning him to the corner.

With a nervous swallow, Clement placed his hand on the counter. “Brandon, go see mom about chores,” He said. The little boy didn’t need to be told twice, he bolted out of the room with a terrified wail.

“For your mistake, just one knuckle,” Eliza pulled something from her waist and too late Holly recognized it as a knife. And that Clement was already missing the tip of his right index finger.

A flash of silver turned ruby red as Clement bit so hard on his lip it also sprouted red. The servant didn’t even cry out, although tears did bead at the corners of his eyes.

The crying came from Holly, who screamed as she stared at the piece of finger on the counter, shortening Clement’s index finger by another length.

Things with the Snow Family are more bloody than ever with this sequel to Wedding Bells. Four brand new stories, never before released here or on patreon. You can buy your own copy right here!

The Mom Group

Joining a mom group changed my life. Honestly I thought I’d be all alone when my husband and I left our hometown for his new job. That was bad enough, but the fact I’d just had little Charlotte three months prior to said move made it actual hell.

I was out on the front yard cradling my fussy child when an angel came down from heaven, and that angel was my neighbor, Karen. She had truly mastered being a mother, all she had to do was hold Charlotte and my baby girl was cooing and quieting right down for her nap. Granted she had done this three times with her kids Staci, Cydney, and Kurtis, but she was exactly what I needed.

Family Reunion now available for preorder!

Image credit: @hoomanerror and macco creations on Facebook

The wedding is over. It’s time for a little family get together.

The Snows are certainly not your average family. But they are loyal to one another, at least. Four stories of Snows, both old and new.

Bluebeard- Nicholas, the only Snow brother who has yet to find his soulmate. But at first you don’t succeed…

Family Reunion- Holly has nothing in common with her prissy cousin, Eliza Jane. Hopefully they can find some common ground when Holly comes to visit for a week.

In Mother’s Closet- There’s something in Bonnie’s closet, and Abraham will make sure it stays a secret.

Brother Dearest- Why was Margaret disowned by the Snows?

Preorder your copy of Family Reunion here!

Preorders for Family Reunion will be available soon!

Blood On Set

Being an actor isn’t easy. I’d like to act full time but right now working the night shift at my local Wal-Mart is what pays… part of the bills. I got three roommates to afford my apartment, we all bond on the impossible dream of catching our big break in the MCU.

Frankly I was through the moon when I finally got called back to do some work as one of the main characters in an indie film. Up until then, all my ‘acting’ skill was as an extra or a dead body and I was dying to actually show what I could do, you know? I wasn’t gonna get paid well but this could’ve been a stepping stone to greater things.

The Man Called Daffodil

I thought I grew up in a good neighborhood, surrounded by good people. Everyone said good morning to each other in the morning, my mom was friends with our neighbors, and we all went to church together. In my young mind, that made us very good people.

Then Daffodil came to town and turned my world upside down.

Little Dead Nancy

‘Little Dead Nancy,

Sitting on the bench,

One eye long,

and one eye gone,

Little Dead Nancy,

The red swing’s open,

come take a seat,

and swing with me!’

I almost completed the summoning of Nancy back when I was a kid. I was somewhere in the second grade, I’d just moved to this new school. Long story short, parents divorced, mom got custody, and now instead of playing with my friends I was surrounded by strangers.