The Odd Cat Lady – Page 2 – Don't fear the monsters

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- Crowley’s Party

And today had been going so well too.

Odra was right in the middle of telling Dullahan about the time she was chasing a butterfly and accidentally went head over heels into a pit when she saw it.

Black armor. All too familiarly black armor.

Odra didn’t even remember consciously making the decision to get out of her chair, she was now suddenly across the room and launched herself at that bastard, that fucking son of a bitch who dared show his face here-

“Um. Ouch.”

It was only when Odra had sunk her teeth into the cretin’s arm that she realized this wasn’t Calipher. Nope. It was definitely his armor, she could guarantee that, but the blond twink inside that armor was not the edgelord Calipher.

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- Nail Polish

“Sahsi? What are you doing?”

The goblin rogue had been so quiet Sahsi hadn’t even heard her enter. The shock of suddenly seeing Odra poke her head up over the foot of the bed almost caused her to drop her nail brush, but she managed to recover and just put it back in the polish cup. “Oh! Odra! I thought you and Garl were handling the bandits near-”

“Already done,” Odra pulled herself up on the bed. “Easiest eighty gold we’ve ever made.”

“They’re… very dead, aren’t they?”

“Dullahan cast sleep on most of them. It was over before Sylvia could summon a single thing.”

Odra pointed towards the nail kit. “Answer my question- what are doing, and what is that?” she asked.

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- The Black Knight is Defeated, Long Live the Oathbreaker

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“Tell me again how you all got beaten by a goblin. And this time, say it in a way that makes me not want to beat you all to death.”

Kendrenal stared at the ground. Not like he was afraid of Calipher or anything. No, of course not. It was easier to observe the tone of its voice when he didn’t have to look in its eyes.

Calipher was angry. No, enraged. It was still limping, apparently the injury the weak goblin had given it was worse than it had initially let on. Worse than a single healing potion could fix. Right now, there was no answers that could pacify it.

“WHAT DID YOU CALL ME, KENDRENAL!?”

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- The Showdown with the Black Knight

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“Calipha. So this is where you’ve ended up. How have you been?”

Calipha clenched her jaw as she lifted her mace in front of her, staring down the smarmy bastard of an aasimar smirking at her.

“Calipher. I’ve been worse. Now leave.”

“No welcome for your brother?” Calipher tutted his tongue. “Shame. Not even inviting me in for tea and-”

Calipha didn’t even look, she slammed her mace into the face of the raider trying to sneak up on her right. The man dropped to the ground with a scream, clutching onto his broken nose. Calipher cackled and tossed his head back.

“Very well then. Least you’ve learned a thing or two since we’ve last seen each other.”

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- The Origin of the Black Knight

“Garl, are you going to keep chewing on these guys until-”

“Get in my way, I’m chewing on you too, Dullahan.”

“… Well, I didn’t know I was your type… but before we begin, my safe word’s apple bread.”

Garl growled as he turned towards Dullahan, ready to rip the idiot limb from limb, but before he could Sylvia stepped between her father figure and the irate gargoyle. “That’s enough- from both of you,” she glowered at both of the men. “Odra’s not here. We’ve combed through the whole town but the only people here are dead humans. But Ficas thinks he’s picked up her trail, she tore out of west gate like a bat out of hell, but she did it under her own power. The half orc was telling the truth.”

“Good, then we can kill him now,” Garl tried to step past Sylvia but she snagged him by his shirt.

“Sahsi literally just put him back together.”

“He’s probably the one who shot her!”

“Doesn’t matter. Aunva’s on her side for this one, the half orc gets to keep breathing. For now.”

Garl growled and Sylvia responded by slapping him. It definitely hurt her more than him, judging by how she immediately shook her hand out afterwards, but it was enough to get Garl to pause.

Right. The half orc might have some more information. Once he found Odra, he’d join his friends in hell.

Garl hurried off, Sylvia watching him go before turning to Dullahan. “What’s his problem?” she asked, crossing her arms.

“Turns out he’s not completely stonehearted. Just hope he keeps his anger on the black knight and not any of us.”

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- Where Did Manyboots Go?

“Have I mentioned how much this sucks yet?”

“About three times this conversation alone, Dullahan.”

“Then I’m saying it again, Ficas- this fucking sucks!”

Ficas turned to literally bite the sassy human’s head off, but the second he looked away from the raider he was fighting, said raider was bashed to the ground and repeatedly stomped on by an enraged gargoyle.

Before Ficas could even say anything said gargoyle tackled the next raider in line, blood spraying into the air as Garl turned his victim into a pile of blood and gore.

Ficas glanced over at Dullahan. “… Is he… usually like this during combat?” he asked.

“Honestly? As far as I know, this is new and I’m about three seconds away from shitting my pants.”

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- When Garl Met Odra

Three years ago…

There was something following him in the brush.

Garl wouldn’t have noticed it if he hadn’t dropped a few gold out of his pouch. Damn thing had a hole in it. He’d bent over to pick the coins up when he saw the brush twitch. Just a little twitch, just enough that he knew something was there. It wasn’t an animal. An animal would run. No, this thing was following him. It was intelligent.

It was hunting him.

How adorable.

Garl waited. Whatever was hiding there couldn’t have been very big. Probably a pissed off gnome from that caravan he hit a few days ago. He didn’t even take much, he just fucked their day for giggles. Not like there was anything else to do. Gods, could he be any more fucking bored?

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots – Battle at Dimborough

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Traveling with Aunva and her party was quite enjoyable. Even if things started off on the wrong foot by Aunva announcing she’d gotten horses for the whole party and Odra screamed in terror, Garl quickly resolved things by plopping Odra on his back and declining to take the draft horse that she’d secured for him- even an enormous steed like that would struggle to carry a pure stone gargoyle. That was fine, they’d just use his horse to carry their supplies, and by every god masked and unmasked Aunva did not know how to pack light.

It was fun traveling at first. Aunva’s men always competed with each other to see who would be lucky enough to sleep in the same tent with her, striving to always have her approval. Dullahan was a hell of a story teller, keeping them all preoccupied in the daylight hours when they had to stop since Aunva couldn’t travel then. Sylvia’s dark sense of humor had Odra laughing and Sahsi looking paler than ever.

It was a great time… until they reached their destination.

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- The Knight in Black Armor

Smoke. Smoke and blood.

Odra stumbled back in the village, spinning around and around to look for any survivors. Any at all. All she could see were corpses. Corpses of her fellow goblin defenders, but also the bodies of the elders, the farmers, the ones that just stayed home to mind the village… the ones who never hurt a fly.

Why? Why would someone do this? Odra weaved through the ruins and the death, whipping her head back and forth as she searched for her friends. “Mitemouth? Fatgut? Where are you guys!?” she called out. “Pach? Uglap? Anyone?! Clammaw?! Hello!? Come on, this isn’t funny anymore! Get out here, you all can’t be dead!”

They couldn’t be. She’d only ran away from the fight as a joke. They couldn’t be dead because of her joke.

Her pace picked up as she reached the center of the village, where some of the fires were still going. The smell of burning flesh made her eyes water but she sped up, the babies were there, if they weren’t moved away the fire would soon-

Odra skidded to a dead stop as she realized the fire was located inside of the pen.

No. They couldn’t have been that cruel.

But they’d been crueler.

The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots – What’s Your Type?

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“Hey Odra!”

Oh boy. Adorable incarnate was here to bother her. Odra sighed and lowered her mug. “Sup, Sahsi. Enjoying life at the guild?” she asked.

Sahsi beamed and took a seat next to Odra. “I love it! It was a lot to get used to, but I kinda fit in here. I’ve even gone on a few jobs. Where’s Garl?”

“Fucking someone at Fit For Kings.”

That was the bonus of having Sahsi think they were friends. She was so easily flustered and it was hilarious. Her pale green cheeks was now noticeably darker. “O-oh. I. Um. That’s… nice.” Sahsi cleared her throat a few times and fanned her face. “So… is he there like. Every night?”